Saturday, February 28, 2015

The sun is nice to see

We had a lot of stuff to do today and most of it was inside. The hub was kind enough to help me finish the rest of the consignment sale stuff. Now all that's left is to get it safely delivered to its destination. Then there was the matter of the consignment prep aftermath. Kids can get a little crazy when there is a tagging gun involved, so I was picking up little plastic pieces all day long...or picking them out of my feet as I stepped on several of them over the course of the day. A birthday present needed to be prepared and the kitchen needed to be straightened. The girls needed to be at church for a singing rehearsal and then we were helping with the community meal at church. So, even though we were busy with inside work, the sun was glorious to see. It's beams broke through the windows like a beacon of hope and warmth. Our moods were buoyed, until we played a knock down drag out game of Blokus and some ugliness occurred, but we rallied after apologies were given. Tomorrow is going to be a busy day, so I am going to bed. I have to be the ukulele accompaniment for my 10 year old's song tomorrow. Pray I don't screw it up for her. Yipes.

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Friday, February 27, 2015

Tired feet, tired mom

It has been a fairly busy day. I've been tagging a lot of Picky Chick items for consignment. Luckily the hub and I have a good system and have for many years. I give him prices, brands and sizes and he is my data entry man. I am grateful for his help. It goes so much faster that way. S got trained on the tagging gun, provided thanks to our friend M, and tagged all the items entered. I also spent a few hours at the mall today. S and her friends were really needing some time together after all this snow and met to shop and eat and just be together. I didn't make the bst decision and wore the wrong shoes. They were the right shoes for the weather, wrong for walking the mall. The hub has gone out with some friends for a little bit, but I hope he might pity me and rub my feet for just a bit when he gets home. Steel toed engineer shoes are not a good idea, although they would have been ideal to kick the obnoxious mall train's reign of terror on the shoppers. I swear that thing tried to purposely run over an elderly couples' toes when they didn't move out of its way quick enough. They had hearing aids for Heaven's sake. They were not aware of its presence. After we got home, the hub and I went to a meeting and then returned home. He went oout for a bit and I made two cakes for a fundraiser lunch on Sunday. The singing group G is in is having a lunch and talent show to raise money for their group. If you are in the area, come and join us. It will be sweet!

I am now going to attempt to go to bed and rest my feet. Tomorrow should be another Picky Chickin' day. It'll all be good. Night all.

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Thursday, February 26, 2015

More 'bout that?

We went to bed with a nice steady snow a-fallin' and woke up with quite a substantial blanket on top of what we already had on the ground. The kids were excited, again, about the snow and how it made everything look fresh and clean and not slushy again. There was also excitement upon finding out that this was the first snow we have had with good packing snow. "Do you wanna build a snowman?" was referenced way too many times today, but it was appropriate for the occasion. The boy wanted to build an igloo, but the sun was not on our side and things started melting and getting unccoperative. This was met with much frustration which ultimately ended our time outside...that and the fact that my children had thrown so many snowballs at my rear end that I needed an immediate change of clothes.

Later this evening, Sarah decided that she wanted to make some more snow cream, kind of a last hurrah for dessert snow. Our bowls that had been so full of lovely, fluffy snow in the morning had been reduced to metal bowls of cold water. So, I sent S outside to get some remaining snow that has not been touched by the dog. A full bowl was brought to the kitchen and I began to mix in the cream part. It got a little soupy for some reason, but I kept on mixing...until something little and brown surfaced. Oh no. I asked where exactly the snow had been harvested from and realized what the brown was. We live with woods in our backyard and lots of frolicking squirrels. They like to sit on our patio railing and eat our hickory nuts...and poop. YES. There was squirrel poop in my lovely vanilla snow cream. And I had tasted it. Wellll, scrap that batch. I sent her out for new, instructing her to skim off the top and to use her flashlight on her phone to make sure there was no yellow or brown in it. We tried again. Meh. Not nearly as tasty as our other batches, but you can't win 'em all. Heck, we were winning in the fact that we weren't eating squirrel feces flavored dessert. I know what my nightmares will be about tonight.

Gag ack barf....

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Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Not above bribery...

It is that time of year again...Picky Chick Consignment sale time! I have worked this sale for a long time. My oldest is 13 I have worked it at least 11 years. It is my favorite sale around and each year when it comes around, it turns into mini reunion time with all the moms and grandmothers I see twice a year. Every year I put off hangind and entering my items until the last minute and every year I have big plans to start sooner than I did the sale before. Seeing as how my drop off date is Monday, I am now in panic mode...big time. Sooooo, I bribed the children. It is amazing how the almighty dollar motivates children who are about to have a trip to Target. They got to work hanging and sorting and checking clothes. It was wonderful. I almost see a light at the end of a very long tunnel.

I see the latest snow storm has begun and school has been cancelled again. Captive consignment helpers again. Yes. Hopefully I will finish tomorrow...after we build some snowmen.

Can you find the boy in the clothes? He's sorting safety pins for me. Now he's not:

It gets interesting around here for sure.
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Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Snow day number.....

Thinking we were on a one hour delay this morning, I told the kids we were going to get up at the normal time to get back on our normal schedule. I looked at my clock and realized I had hit the snooze button once(not bad)and jumped out of bed like I had been was only 6:11, but I never snooze it during the week. I walked into the bathroom to splash my face off and wake up. I asked the hub if he had checked to see if the oldest was up. "School is out." Um, what? "No, it's an hour delay today." "No...look's out." And so it was. All the thawing progress from yesterday was wiped out from the snow that the weather guys call for but I didn't believe would come. The oldest was told to go back to bed and I sat and watched the snow fall. It looked very pretty though it was not good snowman/snowball snow. That didn't stop the kids from burying me in it later on in the morning. The forecasts say that we are supposed to get another storm tomorrow afternoon. We'll see...we'll see. I just know that when the call came in that school was out, um, I think there was a big collective palm to forehead from many parents around the county. What can you do? People wanted snow. They got it.

I won't complain...yet.
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Monday, February 23, 2015

Gonna sit in my car

I am currently sitting in a church gymnasium watching my kids have their soccer practice. Soggy, slushy field conditions were just not conducive for anything other than a future ambulance ride. I appreciate the consideration. As I sit here, I hear the coach really railing on the boy about a skill that he does not get. He'll get it eventually, I know, but with 75 steps to the may take a minute. I will admit, my son is not naturally aggressive. He has two big sisters and has spent more of his time dressed up and playing whatever they are playing than anything else. So when a bunch of 7 and 8 year olds are asked to divide into groups of three, and there are 10 kids, someone is going to ge left out. He will not push his way into the group and make it a foursome. And the kids are not welcoming him into their group to include him. So, he is getting yelled at for not having any touches on the ball. I yelled to my sone, "IF NOBODY WILL LET YOU INTO THEIR GROUP, PUSH YOUR WAY IN!!!". The coach wanted to give me a dirty look...then he started counting kids. Ding ding ding revelation. He rearranged groups to where things made sense. But then a friend of his who is trying to posture for other boys is making fun of him and purposely not including him so he'll get yelled at. It happened again. The boy got yelled at and his "friend" got a great amount of joy out of that. I want to go and get in the car. He needs to learn to deal with these situations. I do too, but I need to deal by getting into the car. Toyota therapy.

The kids have an hour delay tomorrow, but we are supposed to get snow from 4-7am. Who knows what might happen. They've been out of school for six days. It is going to be an adjustment either way. I imagine bedtime will be about 6pm tomorrow. Night all.

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Sunday, February 22, 2015

Shoveling up some slush

Work day today, but I wasn't really wanting to contend with the slush ice frozen death trap of our road. The hub kindly drove me and the oldest to church to start the process of getting the rooms ready for the little people. I left S in my office to surf Pinterest and went to see what was going on up front. I saw our female pastor and one of our building staff out shoveling snow. Oh dear. I found the shovels and went to work. SLush and ice are very heavy! My brother got called up and arrived dressed to labor as did our neighbor A. Meanwhile in the back hallway of the church(sounds like a Batman line), there had been a leak in the roof and several rooms, including the choir and bell rooms, were soggy. So there was the shovel brigade and the vacuum brigade. The children enjoyed watching my brother knock the snow off of the awnings. It was a strange, soggy morning and I will be unable to lift my arms tomorrow, but it was good to be united with friends to work towards a goal and be able to help.

Now I am watching the Oscar preshow. The hub has fled the premises to be away from this. He hates awards shows. I love the Oscars, but agree with the anger felt in the excess. We have people freezing on the streets in our community and the presenters get a swag bag worth well over $100,000. Something very wrong with that. Oh well. I'll snuggle up under the blankets and watch NPH host and hope that I can make it through the whole show. Bradley Cooper's on....see ya.

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Saturday, February 21, 2015

Wow...another snow!

We woke up this morning to a different kind of light coming through the window and the kind of eerily loud quiet that comes with a new snow. I looked out the window and confirmed that there was a nice layer of new snow and big flakes coming down. The kids woke up quickly once I said, "Look out the window!". This then prompted the exit from the bed as if they had received an electrical shock. After a breakfast of coffee cake, they suited up and prepared to make some serious snowmen and snowballs. S was able to get a decent snow person built before the freezing rain came and janked up the snow consistency. The youngers struggled with their body part development which then led them to join forces and build together. What resulted was a shape that, according to G, was a coke bottle. The boy was put out by the way it turned out and disavowed any knowledge as to its existence. I must say, and struggle to do so without putting blue content onto this blog, that Freud would have had some interesting theories as to dreams and the like once he saw the shape. We took a couple runs on the sled, but then things got so soggy, it became not so fun anymore.

They won't say it out loud, but I think the kids will be glad to go back to school. It kind of stinks, especially for the oldest, to be on social media and see friends who live close to each other(or maybe not)have gotten together and she has been left out. I get it that no one wants to risk their life for social time and our street was like a luge course for a, well it still is. Just sucks, really. Middle school....don't get me started.

Time to get ready for bed. My week of sloth is going to hurt tomorrow morning going into work. I will finish this little gem first. My favorite cinematically and literarily(is that a word? I'm making it a word). Number one by a mile. I cried my eyes out the first time I read it and the tenth time I read it. Just perfection. Night all.

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Friday, February 20, 2015

Haircuts and warm hearts

The boy got two big wishes fulfilled today. First, after many weeks of waiting and shagginess, he finally got his mop cut. He may hit a time in his life when he wants to grow his hair out, but right now he is just short of buzz cut all the way around. He has to have enough to make it look spiky and crazy. Life at Jerry's Barbershop was entertaining as never disappoints. Between our snow/ice of the past week, sledding styles, the latest athlete arrests and college basketball, our ears were tired and amused. People will say just about anything in there. I noticed today that there are still people who don't get the concept that you speak nicely and politely to your barber. Do you really want the person who is cutting your hair to be insulteed by the words that come out of your mouth? I'm not going to roll those dice. After the boy lost what looked to be a good pound and a half of hair, we ran to feed and potty the dog and then made our way to fulfilling his second big wish today. When he crawled into bed with me this morning, he was all a chatter about movies coming out today. For quite a while now, he has been strongly suggesting we go see the movie "McFarland USA". Honestly I hadn't seen the previews so I didn't know what it was about. I knew Disney and Kevin Costner were involved, but that was about it. So when he snuggled up this morning, he said, "That movie, the one I want to see, comes out today." "Okay, son. That's great." I snoozed off I think. "Mom? It is rated for someone like me...." "Okay, son." A few minutes later. "Mom, the review I looked up said it was heartwarming. That sounds good, right?". "Yes, buddy, it does. Let's just rest a bit longer." Couldn't have been 5 minutes later, "Mom? I can go look up times on Fandango for you. It opens today." "Son? Can we rest for a bit longer? The mall won't open up for at last another 4-5 hours. And don't you want Dad to go?". "Welllll, uh, Dad night find the seats uncomfortable with his back. You know he may fall asleep since he works so hard...and the seats might be uncomfortable." Between hearing every review that a 7 year old can look up and the dog whiling to get out of her crate and have breakfast, I gave up and got up to start the day. After a fair amount of thought, I decided to go even though it was not playing at our favorite theatre. The kids were pleased that they got to lunch on popcorn and sprite while watching a movie. Let me just say this. For all his suggesting and hinting and sly begging, I was so pleasantl surprised by the movie. My only regret is that we didn't wait for the hub to go with us. It was a phenomenal film. I have always been a sucker for underdog sports movies based on true stories. This one did not disappoint. It was fine for the kids to watch and I didn't have to cover eyes or ears once. Go see it if you can. I absolutely loved it.

One last thing. I hope to someday rejuvenate snail mail before the post office goes completely under. The blog needs something new and I want a mailbag day. Just don't forget to drop a letter or postcard with a few words, a joke or a silly doodle. It would make my month!

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Thursday, February 19, 2015

Hibernation Day

After sledding all day yesterday, we decided to have a pajama day. The temperatures were such that it really wasn't the best of ideas to be outside too much. The kids feasted on waffles, obliged my need to educate them on classic Disney and watched "Fantasia" and helped put away laundry. We also watched one of my favorite kid movies that the children now love: Snow Day. The dog took advantage of the cold to look extra cute, watch the movie and warm us up:

A snow day...where anything can happen...including the dog on a blanket on your lap. If you haven't watched it, you should. It's a good one.

The hub got home tonight and took us out for a little break from the house to get dinner. It was nice to escape, but daggone it was it cold. I can't begin to say how grateful I am for a warm house. My prayers are with all of the homeless people in our community and the ones with unsound houses that don't hold the heat like they should. So very grateful.

Time to snuggle down in bed and get warm. Night all.
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Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Okay, that was close...

Snow day numero dos has come and almost gone. We are all resting and grateful for heat and warm toes and fingers. We got started with the sledding right around ten when the snow was coming down at a nice clip. After a cookie delivery and quick visit with our neighbor, the sleds went to work flying down the street. I upped the game(like an idiot)and trekked up an extra hill that is the access street for the water tank up our street. Oh how fun and unsafe it was. We had several shorter trips outside so as not to get "the frostbite". There were several spectacular crashes and dumb decisions, but we had fun. We also indulged in snow cream on the patio in our snow clothes...even shared some with the dog. She was appreciative.

That is a face that has just tasted a wonderful treat and gotten a doggie brain freeze all at the same time.

After dinner tonight, we all went sledding. The hub had worked all day and hadn't really gotten to see the sledding fun of the day. For some reason, I decided to let him record me going down the upper hill and making sparks on the concrete. I realized halfway through the ride that I may perish before I get to the bottom. Because the temperature had fallen so much, the street had turned from snowy ice to slick track danger. I felt as though I was going the speed that causes the neighbors to yell and shake their fists at cars. When I put the brakes on at the bottom of the hill, I did wreck my knee a bit. Jenny done. I'll quit while I'm ahead. I don't see that we wil go out much tomorrow. It is supposed to be frightfully cold. We may all need recuperate from falling on the ice tonight. Keep your ringers on...I may need help rolling out of bed tomorrow.

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Tuesday, February 17, 2015

I survived...and it was recorded.

Snow day today. Well, really, it was an ice day today, but we'll take what we can get. We went out sledding with our friends by 9. I got over my nerves of embarrassing myself in front of the whole neighborhood and just sat my big rump on the old school sled. Those metal runners work like a charm on the ice and I flew down the hill. There were sibling races and friend races and mom races and STOP for a car and indiidual rides and then more races and then attempts to get the dog on the sled and the STOP for a car and then one more attempt to get the dog on the sled and then, after our extremities were frozen, lunch. The snow clothes were put in the dryer and hot chocolate and lunch warmed us back up. Our poor friend went home and eventually started running a fever, so we did not get to sled with them this afternoon. Here's hoping she feels better tomorrow! At one point, the boy came up to my friend and me and said, "Well, "A Christmas Story" was right. Your tongue does stick to stuff when it is cold." When pressed further, he said that he had stuck his tongue to the front storm door. Wow. No least there were no words until I turned around and he was trying to do it again. So I gave him the fast sled and put him to work. Guess it kind of goes back to him licking everything yesterday. Tonight we made cookies and cleaned out the fridge. Living the dream, friends, living the dream.

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Monday, February 16, 2015 will have to do

So we didn't really get the snow that had been predicted for us. The boy was up at the impressive time of 5am to do a snow check and to see if he needed to go get our neighbor his paper. He was so annoyed by the lack of snow on the ground, that he did something he rarely does unless he is ill: he went back to sleep. It was a school holiday today, so he could have slept all day if he wanted. Once we were all up, I started watching the radar until I couldn't bear to watch it anymore. It seems as though being valley dwellers makes us surrounded by an antisnow forcefield of unbelieveable strength. At one point, the pink and blue on the radar completely surrounded us in a frustrating ring. I got tired of reporting bad weather news to the kids, so I hid in our room in hopes that they would forget and just enjoy the holiday. Then about 11:40, I heard little pecks on our window. Little pieces of ice. The trio took the progress and ran with it. They took the dog outside to watch it land in our bowls we set out for snow cream. The boy took this as an invitation to lick every flat surface on the patio to get frozen water in his mouth. Yuck. I finally convinced them to come inside and eat while we waited for the hub to get home and hopefully then some progress would happen outside. And some did. While we would have much preferred enough snow to build a snowman, we had to remember the ice made our sleds go quite a bit faster. That made up for it and the kids and their friends enjoyed a nice sledding session until it was time to warm up and get some hot chocolate. There are possibilities of snow off and on all week and the temps are not going to allow for much thawing. Snow day tomorrow already, so it's all good. I plan to show off my sledding prowess tomorrow. Check CNN for the gag reel at the end of their broadcast. "Large woman on sled takes out mailboxes before running into light pole" will be comedy gold. Guaranteed.

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Sunday, February 15, 2015

Will it happen?

Snowpocalypse 2015 is on the mind of every person in the Tennessee Valley this evening. Will it come like they said? Children everywhere are following the rules for guaranteeing snowfall that I have outlined previously. We are out regardless tomorrow due to the Presidents' Day holiday tomorrow. They are hoping the magic of wearing pj's inside out and backwards will carry over for the next several days. I would love a nice respectable snow. Growing up just two hours northeast of here, we got lots more snow than they did here. I can travel and drive in it. I worry not about myself, but the crazies who think operating a vehicle in it is no big deal. Eeek.

Late this afternoon one of the children got a funny tummy and got sick. I feel, at times like these, that one can never have enough Lysol or Lysol-esque bleachy wipes. I also like to keep oyster crackers and all that sick tummy stuff on hand. I walked into the grocery store and was swept away in the current of snow fear insanity. One person had 4 gallons of milk in their cart and enough frozen pizzas to feed a frat house. Case after case of bottled water. Carts full of chips. All I wanted to do was get to the Lysol. That's it. They had even set up a mini mobile check out lane to handle the overflow. I found it funny that the girl next to me with an avocado and cottage cheese in her hands and my Lysol, peanut butter and crackers in my cart stood out like a sore thumb in the sea of piled over carts. I saw some people I know and, based on the contents of their carts, we may have to sled on over to join the party.

Here's hoping we get some white stuff and that our sick tummied child just had a flukey thing happen. We wanna build a snowman...

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Saturday, February 14, 2015

Valentine Insanity

As I have said before, Valentine's Day has always been a big deal in our family. My brother and Granny, both Valentine babies, celebrated their birthdays together in a big family celebration with some candy hearts and cards. He usually had a cheesecake and she had a butterscotch dessert...they blew out their candles together and shared a special look with each other that I loved to see every year. Now she has been gone almost five years and I know that the day is little different for him. A new way to celebrate his day and remember his birthday twin at the same time. I'm glad he and his lovely bride can make new traditions for his day. I am so grateful every year on this day that God gave me two things: (1) A woman who will forever be one of the biggest influences on my life, teaching me how to sew, to make a good pie and live my life to honor and glorify God AND (2) My first and strongest best friend who can make me laugh until I wet my pants, astound me with his unbelieveable wisdom and stagger me with his compassion and care for others. I am a blessed sister and granddaughter.

We wanted to try and have a special treat for our dinner tonight, so we got crazy and grilled some steaks and had baked potatoes. Afterwards, the children got their baths, pajama'ed up and came downstairs to have dessert 1970's style. Move over Melting Pot, we had our own hardcore homemade chocolate fondue. The same fondue recipe that my mom has been making us since I was younger than my boy. They feasted on marshmallows, pound cake pieces, strawberries and bananas. We used an old school fondue pot and got crazy. Afterwards, the boy had to run around for quite a while and bring himself down from the sugar high he was experiencing. Valentine's Day insanity. Again, a blessed woman with this crew. My cup runneth over.

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Friday, February 13, 2015

Full day done

The elementary school had its annual jump rope event to raise funds. This year the focus was to improve the playground. It is hard to believe that it is G's last year to jump for her school. Makes me kind of sad to think about that, but life goes on whether we want it to or not.

The boy was very serious about his jumping. G was as well, but she tends to dance and jump at the same time...depending, of course, on the song. They were happy and jumpy and sweaty and crazy. I enjoy it every year.

This evening we went to church to pay our respects to our sweet neighbor on the death of his sweet wife. It was quite the showing and what a testiment to how loved and respected she was and her family is. I am sure that the family must be absolutely exhausted after the shock and the week that they have had. Say a prayer for all of them.

I'm jumped out. Night all.
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Thursday, February 12, 2015

Oh, snow...don't tease us!

I was in a workout session, getting tortured when all of a sudden someone yelled, "LOOK!". Luckily I did not fall off the the whatever it was I was doing calf raises on as I whipped around to look. Snow! A nice looking snow was coming down. We all began to discuss what kind of mass panic must be going on in town since white stuff was falling from the sky. I imagine the dairy section of the Kroger quickly took a hit and school children lost their minds...and teachers lost control. After 15 minutes, the mulch was just barely peeking through its covering and then, BAM, the sun came out. D'oh!! As quickly as it had blanketed, it was gone. I know the upper half of our country would gladly send their share down to us and find us crazy to beg for snow, but come on. Just one good and healthy snow that could get us maybe two snow days. I think we have 7. Oh well.

The girls and I got our heads of hair tended to today. The carnage that was left on the floor looked to be enough to stuff o couple of throw pillows. The thinning out process alone of G's hair could have filled one I think. I feel so much better. Nothing like getting good and trimmed up when you are a short hair person.

Well that is the excitement of my boring life. I know you're jealous.

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Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Deep thoughts...right before bed

It seems in our house that all the deep conversations happen in one of three situations: driving in the car, sitting at the dinner table or getting tucked into bed. Tonight it was bedtime. Discussions of eating disorders and suicide blanketed my child as I tucked her into bed. Not exactly the subject matter to rock you to sleep at night, but the conversation was important. It was painful and uncomfortable and frightening, but it had to happen. Regardless of when it took place, I am so glad that my children still come to us for advice and questions and counsel. I pray they will always feel comfortable.

On a completely different subject, I will put a picture up that involves some explanation. The dog, as we all have seen in posts past, loves to chew up beds...every one she gets. We had such hopes for this one. It was on clearance. At Kroger. For a ridiculous price. It was perfect. And then she found a weakness and exploited it to the point that we had pink stuffing everywhere. The kids and I angrily bagged it up this afternoon and put it in the corner to be dealt with at a later time. When I got home from work this evening, this is what I found:

She may destroy beds, but she still wants to lay on them. She is crazy.

You have a crazy picture? A silly note you want me to share? Just remember there is a PO Box out there waiting for something to come visit. Remember it is:

Please Don't Kiss the Dog Blog
P.O. Box 18347
Knoxville, TN 37928

Look forward to hearing from you!
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Tuesday, February 10, 2015


Today we woke up to hear sad news. Our dear friend and neighbor passed away suddenly in the night. We are so saddened at her loss. She had become like a grandmother to our children and a wonderful friend to us. She made excellent hot rolls, played a mean game of Kings in the Corner and was possibly one of the kindest people every placed on this sphere. Heaven has gained quite the saint. Godspeed, sweet friend. We will miss you terribly.

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Monday, February 9, 2015

Say a prayer

We are so fortunate to live in the neighborhood that we do. Sure, we have some issues with difficult people who choose to torture most of us and defy the "Love thy neighbor" commandment and all that, but they are in the minority thank goodness. One of our sweet neighbors is currently in the hospital fighting pneumonia. We all know that the older one gets, the harder these things are to get over. I just ask you to pray that lungs get clear and a fighting spirit remains. Pray hard.

Night all.

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Sunday, February 8, 2015

I want to bake

During my waiting period before Downton Abbey comes on(yes, I am one of those people), I am watching The Great British Baking Show. How evil that they put this on at 8pm! I can't even spell what mystery pastry they are making tonight, but it involved a massive amount of butter and sugar. If it wasn't so late, I would be down in the kitchen working up something in there. Instead, I am watching them make eclairs.

My son has decided that he wants to communicate with the world, so he needs every language app available for his ipad. Once i told him of the study of linguistiics, that was all he needed to hear. He still walks up to just about everybody saying, "Mi nombre es ----." Just watch out world...he is coming to entertain you in many different languages. And I have no doubt that he will.

An update for all three of you. My children have wanted to start various and sundry youtube channels and pen pal relationships here in recent days. As a paranoid parent, it is hard to give out personal information with all the weirdos and creepers out there. So, I took a little cash I had stored away and got a little P.O. box for a few months worth of commitment to see how it went. My oldest wants to offer tips and tricks that teenage girls would find interesting and, if they so desire, they can send her mail or swag(a word she hates). So, being a 21st century blogging mom with no life, I am going to put the PO box up here. I will figure out a way to post in permanently on the blog page, but for it is:

Please Don't Kiss the Dog Blog
P.O.Box 18347
Knoxville, TN 37928

Send me a note. I hope a happy note....otherwise I might write a sad post about hate mail...that will undoubtedly turn into a silly post about hate mail.

The British drama is about to start, so I shall leave you now. Keep those cards and letters rolling in dear readers!

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Saturday, February 7, 2015

Busy evening

Tonight is the annual Father Daughter Valentine's dance at church. The girls have been going for years and it has become quite the event each year. Fathers and daughter, uncles and nieces, brothers and sisters, grandfathers and granddaughters all attend and make memories. Mostly, the dads dance maybe one or two dances and then the girls dance with each other. The dads then move to one wall, hold it up while talking to each other and try to keep count of how many cookies each girl has eaten. Hopefully they keep good enough count to not revisit the cookies later on in the evening.

The moms have a special date night with their boys. Sometimes we go as a group, like bowling or jumping, and sometimes we stay in and relax. Tonight the boy chose to stay home, dine on ramen noodles and Cherry Garcia in his pajamas and cuddle while we watch Andy Griffith. How can I argue with those choices? I look as forward to dance day as the girls do. Sweet memories.

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Friday, February 6, 2015

Writer's block

I have had nothing in terms of funny happen this week that really make me want to share with the three of you reading. As of right now, I am sitting at futsal practice, wondering how parents of some of these smart mouthed children don't lose their minds. Sorry. That was a bit of an aside.

Today I got a bit freaked out when the car alarm starting going off this afternoon. We had a car break in up the street a week ago and we are all kind of on high alert. There has been a lot of suspicious activity around our neighborhood and the surrounding ones as well. Oh yeah, I may have mentioned the two police officers who came to visit us at 8am Saturday morning to help allay our fears about residential street toughs. Copper, the dog that will gladly attack knotty pine trim with the violence of viscious land shark, would not bark if the devil himself strolled into our front she's kind of useless. She'd cry and want to run out to play with him, possibly pull his forked tail a little. So in terms of a watchdog against petty criminals wearing the neighborhood out with their antics....

The boy survived his stomach malady this week. As many of you know, the subject of vomit is not one that I choose to be well versed on and would prefer to remain ignorant on for the rest of my life. So while he rested as comfortably as possible with a bum belly, I scrubbed strawberry yogurt barf out of his arm splint. Living the dream, folks, living the dream. Luckily he has good aim and control, so when he felt the need he hit his mark of the trashcan with the precision that made a barf-phobic mom proud. The rest of the time he watched lots of classic television shows and said strange things in his feverish state. Pitiful but entertaining all at the same time.

Tomorrow the hub will take his two girls to the annual Father Daughter Valentine's danc at church. I imagine a big evening of dads standing in a line talking and a large group of girls dancing in the middle of the gym, hopped up on punch and cookies. It is truly an act of love for his daughters for the non dancer dad that the hub is. It is a sweet memory for all of them. I will make sure to put pictures up as I get them.

Night all.

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Thursday, February 5, 2015


There was a little glimmer, a tiny inkling of hope that we might see a few flakes of snow when we woke from our slumber this morning. The roads had all been treated as they were wearing the patterned lines of the brining trucks. The teachers at school were prepping the children on the proper superstitious rituals to be followed in order to ensure snow:

1. Wear your pj's inside out and backwards.
2. Put ice cubes in the toilets.
3. Do a snow dance in the yard.
4. Put spoons under your pillow.
5. Put white crayons in the freezer.

All of these rituals were followed by the boy. He set to work on his list as soon as he got home from school. G helped with the placement of ice cubes. I sat thinking that we were already weather challenged because the brining had jinxed all the possibilities...but even I had hopes and thought about putting the evaporated milk in the fridge to ready it for snow cream. But I didn't. At bedtime, the boy came down to show me his pajamas being worn in the appropriate style for snow coaxing. He was fired up.

6:03am this morning. It was 40 degrees and we didn't need to state the obvious state of our city from a weather perspective. I went to wake up the children. "Good morning!". Groaning...lots of groaning. "I hate to tell you that not a flake of snow has fallen. I am so sorry." The boy woke up, saw that his sister had not followed the wardrobe rules for pajama wearing and yelled, "I told you to do it! I told you!". "Uh, buddy. Your sister's choice to not wear her pj's inside out and backwards did not ruin the snow chances. The 40 degrees ruined it." All I have to say is I am glad that the boy got the most popular substitute who gives out bubble gum. He was a joy and a delight this morning. That sub deserved double pay with a classroom of disappointed kids.

Here's hoping we get some snow soon. If only our excessive rain and bursts of crazy cold would come together like the chocolate and peanut butter in a Reese Cup. There would be children cheering everywhere. Night all.

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Wednesday, February 4, 2015

I need a 2nd, 3rd and 4th job

I started pricing ski wear and equipment today. It has always been one of my hopes to get to take the family skiing, sip hot chocolate by a nice fire in a chalet and have snowy trips. We are pale and freckled people, well, most of us. My 10 year old can tan some, but we are not meant for the beach. Sure I like to swim, but I would rather be swooshing my way down the slopes.

I started my search at a ski equipment retailer, moved to a national chain sporting goods store, then to the bullseye store, then to eBay and now I am on Craig's list. I have no problem buying secondhand stuff and it looks like that is what we will be doing for a bit. And that s okay. It'll just make our debut on the slopes that much sweeter. Swoosh...swoosh...swoosh....

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Tuesday, February 3, 2015

Andy, Avengers and Applesauce

So, no surprise, the boy did not go to school today. When I arrived home after G's choir practice, he was burning a respectable fever so school was a no. The hub kindly went in to work late, made a 6:30am Kroger run for Jell-o and oyster crackers and then took the kids to school to I could sit with the boy. I must admit that I took advantage of his loopy state to go back to sleep for a tiny little bit. Afterwards, the laundry folding and putting away began. I really couldn't take much more PBS or other children's programming, so we put on Netflix and watched the Andy Griffith Show. He even laughed out loud at some of the episode, so I knew he was on the mend. He needed and Opie and Barney break, so we switched over to the Avengers cartoon for a while and he dined on one of the essentials in the BRAT diet: applesauce. I am grateful that the applesauce, toast, jell-o, oyster crackers, ginger ale and chicken bouillon he had over the course of the day did not make an encore performance. He held them down and even had a sense of humor.

Let's hope that he can go to school tomorrow and keep his very bland, very pale meal down and go fever free for another day. Fingers crossed and prayers sent up.

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Monday, February 2, 2015

The barfs have arrived

The boy never ceases to amaze me. He went to bed last night clutching the trash can, but never once threw up. I saw what he ate to celebrate a ball game that he didn't even watch, so I can imagine his tummy did not feel good. This morning he woke up saying his tummy hurt, but he also said it was sleepy and all that business. He got dressed, ate some yogurt and got his stuff together like always. He bebopped out of the car in a cheerful way and bounced into school. All was well. I filled the gas tank and was about halfway through my Kroger run when...I got the call. Apparently one of the staff rounded the corner on her way to speak to a child and found my boy wiping vomit off of himself. Excellent. He had not even been at school an hour. Really? So I checked out all 18 bags of Goldfish crackers...they are on sale for .99 and make great snacks, don't you dare judge me :0)...and sped up to the school. He was a nice shade of pale-ish green. We packed up and I took him home where I had him strip everything off and drop it directly into the washer. He got a shower and got settled on the sick mattress in our room. He threw up two more times, a good hour in between each, and then kind of wilted the rest of the way. Poor guy will not be going back to school tomorrow. A fever nicely decided to show up.

Just pray the rest of us can avoid it. Pray really hard. Night.

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Sunday, February 1, 2015

Meh, commercials....

I have to say that by this time in the season, I care nothing about the game going on at the Super Bowl and really only care about the commercials. That's the reason to watch anyway, right? Neither team playing is a favorite. The Patriots have a jerk for a QB and the Seahawks have a jerk for a coach. Yeah, I said it. But good grief, advertisers, this has proven to be one of the most depressing years in terms of ads. Children who have been killed and women on 911 calls and Harry Chapin songs...good gracious! I need a few rooms full of puppies and babies and happy things to wash away the commercial trauma.

Tomorrow starts a busy week, but we are no different than anyone else. I am ready for all of us to be together under one roof again. I don't feel settled otherwise. I hope all of you have a wonderful week. Let's hope for a little snow...or a lot!

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