Monday, March 4, 2013

Time to pull out my rare, um, stuff....

Whilst waiting for "The Following" to come on Fox and make me nervous, I am currently watching Antiques Roadshow on PBS. Sorry, but I couldn't stomach "The Bachelor" tonight...or ever. I was confirmed in my decision when I turned on and saw one of the Keno brothers, who are apparently like the twin studs of the antiques appraising world:



Tonight they are in Wichita, KS and have had several $2000-$10,000 items. Kind of sad when that kind of money draws yawns out of anyone. I want some little old man, about to have his house foreclosed on, bring in a $4 garage sale knick knack and Leigh Keno tell him it is worth a staggering $700K. Then they take it to Sotheby's because, well, it's Sotheby's and it goes at auction for $1.2 million dollars. Leigh Keno and Sotheby's help save little old man and he can live out his years being fed peeled grapes, bon bons and umbrella drinks by island women in coconut bras and grass skirts. Whew. I really need to either get a life or call the PBS phone bank and donate some money so they can keep this show aaroung for-EVER! I did find out they are coming here in July, actually on G's birthday. I guess it would be wrong to make her go sit in the audience on her birthday. Come on, mother of the year, it would be wrong. My question is this: when people are fortunate enough to have an item that is appraised for a ridiculous price, are they then assigned armed guards to escort them back to their vehicle? Have people been assaulted over rare Hummels? There are sick people out there. Here is my stern warning to you Knoxvillians: if you have anything you were given that was handed down from someone with multiple greats before their name, find a friend who works out a lot and is in to Terminator movies with you. One can never be too safe. Then head straight for a Keno brother. Tell them their number one fan sent you.
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