My oldest child is a great kid, responsible and true, but she is something that I will never be: a shopper. Unless it involves a bookstore or, back in the day a record store, I am good to stay home. She plans and researches for weeks ahead of time, budgeting her money and planning amounts for each family member. She has been looking forward to Black Friday shopping for a long time and the decided departure time from Casa de Loco was 6:30am. That alarm clock was not a happy sound this morning, I will tell you that, but I got up and got S up as well. Last minute change of plans, we had to take the hub's van. My doors were frozen shut...well at least 4 of the 5 of them. That's a problem. Vehicle changed and we were on our way. Our first destination was a Target store out in the western part of the county. Upon entering the store, and lots of stores after, I learned things.
1. Caffeinate and eliminate before you "consumerate". I think that is self explanatory.
2. Start every question to all employees with "I'm so sorry to bother you with this question, but...".
3. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT make eye contact with the Mediterranean skin cleanser kiosk. They sense weakness and will slather you with goop.
4. Stay away from the little train that drives little chilldren around the mall. That man is serious about his job and apparently has a hard schedule to meet at each station stop. I saw him clip a woman coming out of Williams-Sonoma with her cider sample. Conductor don't play. He honked his horn and clanged his bell with great "authoritay".
5. Don't stare at anyone with a cart overflowing with the same item or strange combo of items, like a cart full of gloves or one full of Natty Light and boxes of Eggos. You just need to move on and make up their story in your head.
I will think of more, but feet are calling for motrin. I should have worn my pedometer, because these dogs are barking. Night all.
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